Holiday Support for Enneagram Type Six
- The Broken & Beautiful
- Dec 19, 2025
- 4 min read
Updated: Jan 12
with Patria Rector & Ro Elliott
This post is part of our short, practical series on holiday support for the nine Enneagram types. Today, we’re focusing on Type Six.
Type Six: The Loyalist, the Devil's Advocate, The Guardian
Type Sixes are often called The Loyalist or The Devil’s Advocate. They belong to the head triad—along with Types Five and Seven—sometimes referred to as the fear triad.
All of us experience fear. But Type Six sits right at the center of it.
I often say Sixes experience a double dose of fear—not because they’re weak or anxious by nature, but because their nervous system is wired to scan for threat in order to keep themselves and the people they love safe.
Their core defense is hypervigilance.
This doesn’t mean actual danger is necessarily present. It means the internal scanner is always on—watching, anticipating, preparing. The Six’s lens assumes something could go wrong, so it’s better to be ready.
Scanning, Bracing, Preparing
For Type Sixes, safety is everything.
They often prepare for worst-case scenarios, rehearse conversations ahead of time, and seek reassurance—sometimes without realizing they’re doing it. What feels obvious and necessary to a Six can feel surprising to others.
A question I sometimes ask Sixes is: Do you sit with your back to the wall so you can see the whole room?
Not a diagnosis—but it can be a clue.
Sixes tend to brace for what could go wrong. And during the holidays—when travel, family dynamics, expectations, and old wounds converge—that vigilance can intensify.
The Inner Committee and the Fear Loop
Ro Elliott describes one of the core struggles for Sixes as the constant internal dialogue—the inner committee of “what ifs”:
What if this goes wrong?
What if they misunderstand me?
What if I say the wrong thing?
What if I’m not safe?
This fear-based scanning can become a kind of confirmation bias. If you’re looking for danger, you’ll often find evidence that confirms it—even when the situation is ambiguous or neutral. This is especially hard in families where there are unspoken tensions or unresolved dynamics. Sixes feel those cracks immediately. Their reactivity may seem outsized, but often it’s responding to something real that hasn’t been named.
And this is where Sixes offer a surprising gift.
Sixes as Truth-Tellers and Catalysts
Though it can be uncomfortable, Sixes often function as truth-tellers within families and groups. Their vigilance picks up what others overlook or avoid.
Ro shared that in her own family, a Six’s reactivity ultimately led to deeper conversations and healing around long-standing dynamics that hadn’t been addressed. Once those things were named, the Six could finally rest.
This is an important truth:
Sixes don’t do well in environments where issues are minimized, avoided, or denied.
But when safety, honesty, and repair are present—Sixes become deeply loyal, steady, and all-in.
Projection and the Horror Movie Screen
One of the hardest patterns for Sixes is projection.
I often describe it this way: fear creates a horror movie playing on a screen in front of them. The images feel vivid, convincing, and real. And because the fear feels so true, the reactions to it can actually create the very chaos they’re trying to avoid.
This is not a moral failure—it’s a nervous system response.
The work for Sixes is learning to pause and ask:
What is actually happening right now?
Where does my intuition and reality end and projection begin?
This is an inside job—but one Sixes don’t have to do alone.
Micro Bravery: Courage in Small Moments
So what does courage look like for Type Six?
Not giant leaps.
Not fearlessness.
But micro bravery.
Small moments of choosing presence over panic.
Ro describes it beautifully:
When fear rises, Sixes can gently ask themselves, “Is this true?”
Sixes already have strong intuition. The challenge isn’t insight—it’s trust.
Trusting themselves.
Trusting their inner knowing.
Trusting that fear doesn’t get to run the whole show.
Courage, for a Six, is winning one moment.
And then another.
And another.
String enough of those moments together, and fear loosens its grip.
The Path Forward for Type Six
For Sixes, healing isn’t about eliminating fear. Fear will always be part of their awareness.
Healing is about learning to:
contain fear rather than obey it
trust themselves alongside trusted others
distinguish intuition from projection
allow safety to come from within
When Sixes learn this, they become some of the most grounded, loyal, courageous people in any system.
Not because fear disappears—but because it’s no longer in charge.
If This Resonated…
If this glimpse into Type Three felt familiar or stirred something meaningful, share it with someone who might appreciate a gentle invitation toward deeper self-understanding.
And if you’d like to hear the full conversation, you can listen to the episode of Echoes and Edges on your favorite podcast platform. (Apple Podcasts / Spotify) While you’re there, follow or subscribe, leave a five-star review, and help more people find this work.
Echoes and Edges is produced and edited by Stephen R. Sanders, music by Envato, and is part of the Vivid Livid Podcast Network—where bruises speak and healing finds its voice.
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